stop yodeling until oktoberfest

maybe the funniest thing the New York Times has printed, ever:

A Rough Script of Life, if Ever There Was One

... "Caller from the 100 block of North Morehead Street requested to speak to animal control because caller felt that someone was coming into his yard and cutting the hair on his dogs. Dispatch advised caller to set up video surveillance on his house. Caller said he planned on it." ...